50 ways to piss off Sasori

1. Refer to him as your "sex puppet"

2. Suggest that Deidara calling him "master" might not be as innocent as everyone thinks

3. Show him fanfiction

4. Record his reaction

5. Flick him constantly

6. If he asks you to stop, tell him he shouldn't care since he can't feel it anyway

7. Tell him his parents finally came home to Suna right after he left

8. Point out that all the red heads in Naruto are screwed

9. Laugh at him for being beat up by an old hag and a sixteen year old

10. Ask if he kept his "vital organs" when he turned himself into a puppet

11. If he refuses to answer, assume that means no

12. Ask him if that makes it difficult for Deidara when they're being intimate

13. Ask if he'll put on a puppet show for you

14. Take Deidara's clay and blow up his puppets

15. Blame Deidara

16. If he tries to talk to you, make loud beeping sounds

17. Inform him he needs counseling

18. Ask why the hell he keeps his heart in a pringles container

19. Ask him to paint your nails for you

20. Graffiti him when he's asleep

21. Tell him if he was human, he'd have felt it and woken up

22. Bug him constantly to find out his age

23. When he finally tells you, wrinkle your nose and say "Eww, you're old"

24. Use the blades on his back to trim your hair

25. Use the same blades to cut grass

26. Take off his arm and run away with it

27. Buy a lot of Sasodei doujinshi

28. Leave them scattered around the headquarters for everyone to see

29. Make sure he can't eat, then eat a huge cake in front of him

30. Be sure to tell him constantly about how DELICIOUS this cake is

32. Ask him if he's emo

33. Ask if he's good at the robot

34. Sign him up for breakdancing classes

35. Tell him it was an order from Pein

36. Ask why he travels in such an ugly puppet

37. Accuse him of using his chakra strings to control people for...personal things

38. When he reminds you he couldn't feel it even if he did make people do that, look confused and ask why the hell he does it then

39. Unwind the cord in his stomach all the way and tie it around a tree

40. Play jumprope with it

41. Steal his puppet scrolls

42. Replace them with scrolls that would summon bowls of jello

43. Ask why his ring symbol is "the virgin" and if that has any hints about personal life

44. Tell him he's like Trix cereal, way too fruity

45. When he asks what you mean by that, respond "Your mom!"

46. Draw pictures of him paired with just about anyone in the series

47. Have an "emotionless bastard" contest between him and Itachi Uchiha

48. Use the tip of Hiruko's tail to pick your nails

49. Tell the rest of the Akatsuki that tomorrow's his birthday and insist you celebrate it

50. Show him this list